It is going to be awhile

So it's been awhile since I updated this...

Unfortunately, there is no good news. Originally we thought we'd be home with a baby sometime this year but now the projected wait is another year. We are, uh, frustrated and disheartened to say the least. We were told things change in international adoption, expect the unexpected...but still, it's been really hard to cope with this news.

So now we are just hoping that this actually does happen! That things keep moving in Ethiopia, that agencies are completing ethical adoptions, and that there is a child out there waiting for us.

Anyway, that is that. We'd appreciate thoughts and prayers. It is obviously a little more difficult than we thought it would be.

In the meantime, however, we've been busy. We were in Paris for Christmas with the Werner family and had a great time! I am leaving for a week in Colombia next month for VLM work and Mike will be traveling to the Pacific Northwest to visit friends and family. So...it is good for us to be busy. It takes our minds off this crazy process.

If you are still following this thanks for hanging in there with us!

7 months of waiting! No news! It's still just us!

The waiting is hard, as you can imagine. We have tons of things to do to prepare for the baby, but it seems we have so much time that neither of us has been motivated to do them.

We have lots to do in the meantime...a trip to Paris for Christmas, finishing my PhD, possibly going back to Ethiopia next year with VLM...things we probably wouldn't be doing if we had the baby, but still!

Thanks for your thoughts and well-wishes!

You know it's going to be a long wait when...

• You cry while watching The Biggest Loser. It was very touching...right...?
• You dream about babies, about far away countries, about the day when you get "the call"
• You spend your free time reading about other people's adoption experiences on their blogs...and you kind of feel like you know them a little.
• You read other adoption blogs and cry again (this time out of joy) when other people get referrals for their children.
• You can't even drive by Babies R Us. Some days it is just too much.

That's my story. This is Jess, btw, not Mike. Mike will have you know that he certainly did NOT cry at the Biggest Loser. And I don't think he is obsessed with the blogs like I am. But I'm pretty sure he does have the aversion to Babies R Us. We had one overwhelming experience in the diaper aisle and I don't think he'll be going back anytime soon.

6 months down...somewhere between 12 and 14 to go... Inshallah.

Fall is here!

Hi! Yes, it has been awhile :)

We haven't blogged much lately because we don't have any news, unfortunately. It actually looks like our wait will be a lot longer than we originally expected, definitely at least 18 months- probably longer. We are about 6 months into the wait. Just trying to be patient...

People ask all the time "Why does it take so long?" and "Why will it be so much longer?" and we've come to the realization that we really don't know. There are a few things we do know:

A) There are many more adoption agencies working in Ethiopia than there were even a year ago. Since adoption in Ethiopia is relatively new, the system is trying to work out the kinks...but with all the new agencies and new demand they have been slow to accommodate everyone. This is our understanding of what might be causing the hold up.

B) Our agency has a long wait- longer than some. Some days we think about switching because some of the newer agencies have a much shorter wait time. However, the trade off is that some of these agencies are newer, and not as established. Our agency has a long wait time because there are many people using it who trust the agency just like we do. The agency's history in Ethiopia and history of ethical practice are two big reasons we chose it among all the options we had. Not to say any other agency isn't as ethical, but working in an established agency with a history of strong ethics was something that was important to us. International adoption can have some sticky issues, and we are comfortable knowing that are agency has the best interests of the children and the people of Ethiopia in mind. We did a lot of research before choosing an agency. But some days we get frustrated with the long wait!

It seems illogical- there are millions of orphans in Ethiopia so why can't all the people waiting just adopt these children already? And that is true, but I know all of us waiting parents want to make sure all the adoptions that take place follow the rules. So I guess if it takes a little longer to do that, it is ok.

So...that is what is new with our wait time.

In the meantime we are trying to enjoy the time we have together! We are just doing the normal- working, studying, traveling when we can, reminiscing about our fabulous trip to Ethiopia in May...

Here are some more pics from the trip. These were taken by Leah. Feel free to click on the shutterly link below (last entry) to see more pictures!

Ethiopia!!!

Hi everyone!

We have been slacking on our blog but we have a good excuse- we got back from 3 weeks in Ethiopia! It was a fantastic trip! Mike had a great time, loved the country, and it was so wonderful to experience Ethiopia together.

We didn't have much time in Addis either on the way in or out. We did manage to find a couple of hours the day we left to go try to find the CHSFS care center. We didn't have an address (this is Ethiopia, the land of PO Boxes) but we knew the area it was in, so we hired a very nice and patient taxi driver to help us find the office. We had to stop on the side of the road about 5 times asking for directions, but eventually we found the care center. We did not go inside but we got to see what it looked like, where it was located, etc. We felt really good about it after we saw it. We didn't go in because it was Saturday, the day new families meet their babies for the first time. As you can imagine, this is a really personal time for them and we didn't want to be getting a tour in the midst of things. We decided it was best to at least see the facility and where it is located.

The care center is in a part of Addis where there are lots of embassys and development agencies. It is basically a 'suburb' and much quieter than where we stay in the center of the city when we are in transit. That being said, there is something special about being in the middle of the action in the capital city- although when we go to pick up our child I think we will be thankful for a peaceful and quiet setting.

We are now three months into our wait for our referral. We are expecting between 9 and 12 more. The wait times have been fluctuating. We are hoping for a summer referral and then hopefully traveling next fall, however, it is very possible everything could take longer than expected. So we are trying not to get too attached to a certain date or time; just to go with the flow.

Here is a link to an album we made on shutterfly. Enjoy the pictures!

http://share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=8IatmLZy4cMXw&emid=sharview&linkid=link5&cid=EMsharview

1 month down...

How many to go? That is the big question! The wait is still estimated at 12-18 months.

Mike and I leave in two weeks for Ethiopia. I can't believe this trip is already here! Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers while we are abroad. :)

We are on the waiting list!

After 5 months of paperwork, social workers, classes, and general confusion, we are finally on the waiting list at our agency. We were shooting for May so being waitlisted a month early is great. Unfortunately, the wait has increased from 12-18 months. So we are going to be making up for this time later.

At least now we don't have to worry about frantically tracking down notaries and harrassing friends to send us letters. Now we just wait.

I spend some of my "free" time reading other adoption blogs. It is so nice to read about other people who have been through the same process. The process is hard. I think the waiting will be even harder, but now we can try to focus on other fun stuff and getting ourselves ready to be parents. We have a lot to learn!

One nice thing about our agency is that all waiting parents are invited every month to meet up and chat about the wait. I hope we'll be able to go often. I am looking forward to meeting more people who are in the same place as we are, and making some new friends as well.

In other happy news, two of our good friends had babies in the last few weeks. Thomas and Ginger welcomed Jacob and Stacy and Brian welcomed Ava. Also, a few other friends are pregnant and due this summer. It is fun to experience that process with our friends, and share in their excitement as they meet their little ones for the first time. Our child will definitely have a baby play group when he/she arrives! We can't wait!

Thanks for all the love, prayers, and support. Exciting times ahead...fingers crossed for 2010.